Fortunately, what’s good for flighters turns out to be good for everyone. Flighters might just need a little extra encouragement and support. He believes that the best way to address conflict avoidance is by creating a culture where employees feel valued and listened to. “The negative side effects of conflict avoidance are often high turnover, a dysfunctional working environment, strained communication, loss of productivity and impaired teamwork,” Hearn said. Being conflict avoidant also impacts our relationships because we’re cutting off all honest communication with the other person. Aside from our work life, avoiding conflict can manifest in our romantic relationships, friendships, and even family dynamics.

  • When issues aren’t resolved, they’ll probably come up again, and again, and again.
  • Whether conflict happens between friends, coworkers, or romantic partners, it’s perfectly normal.
  • Eventually, however, you will want to experience those situations in real life.
  • You know you have the right answer, and you have proof to back you up.

She’s written for The Atlantic, New York Magazine, Teen Vogue, Quartz, The Washington Post, and many more. Avoid being accusatory or defensive when approaching the co-worker who took how to deal with someone who avoids conflict all the credit for your work. While getting out of these damaging patterns is tricky, there are ways to move forward in the face of our fears and express our emotions authentically.

Why Do We Avoid Conflict?

Many people dislike conflict, but in some cases, conflict avoidance can harm your relationships and health. One of the most important skills for any manager is the ability to communicate. By taking time to hear what employees have to say, leaders can better understand what the problem truly is and how it can be fixed. You can show your partner that you’re paying attention by using active listening techniques.7 When your partner speaks, paraphrase what they say — that is, rephrase it in your own words. You can also perception-check, by making sure that you’re interpreting your partner’s reactions correctly. For example, “You seem irritated by that comment — am I right?” These strategies both prevent misunderstandings and show your partner that you’re paying attention to them and care about what they’re saying.

how to deal with someone who avoids conflict

Consider practicing conflict-management skills in low-stress situations. Therapy and anxiety-management techniques might also help you cope during conflict. Other times, partners may mope and pout without really addressing an issue. Partners may also simply avoid discussing a problem by quickly switching topics when the issue comes up or by being evasive.

Conflict Resolution Skills

Through applying these strategies you can effectively navigate and resolve conflict with your … [+] colleague and ensure a successful working relationship moving forward. For example, deciding a late friend doesn’t care enough to be on time, or that a tired partner is denying sex out of passive-aggressiveness. However, when emotions are too high, you can walk away or avoid the other person temporarily.

The Fictitious Reality of Avoiding Conflict – Psychology Today

The Fictitious Reality of Avoiding Conflict.

Posted: Wed, 11 Oct 2023 07:00:00 GMT [source]

Since you can’t always avoid conflict, it may be beneficial to consider these tips and tricks for communicating effectively, especially with someone defensive. But it requires effort on everyone’s part, so while it might offer more long-term benefits than other conflict resolution strategy, it may have less popularity than quicker solutions like compromise. The others involved may feel positively toward you, but keep in mind that always accommodating other people when disagreements come up keeps you from getting your own needs met. Maybe you don’t mind not getting what you want since you want your partner to be happy. Or maybe you genuinely don’t care about where you go on vacation. Managing conflict doesn’t necessarily mean preventing conflict.